Or at least I’m led to believe.

Because after offering $50 in absolutely free, no-strings, no-blood money to my loyal and fabulous readers a few weeks back in exchange for entertaining me with a few lines jotted down as a faux postcard in the comments section, only 2 people took up the challenge.

Maybe I asked too much. I know I hate writing postcards when I’m on vacation. But if I knew that it might garner me 50 cold bones on the other side, I’d probably be a little more inspired.

Just in case there were some procrastinators out there who intended to write something witty or enlightening, but lost track of time, you’ve got one last chance.

Just click here and leave your postcard in the comments section. It doesn’t have to be long. It doesn’t have to be filled with meticulous description of the bougainvillea outside your hotel room balcony (unless you want it to). It just has to transport us ever so temporarily to a favorite place and time of yours. And really, even if you just said, “Lots of pork,” you know it’d get my attention.

So what are you waiting for? The butler to depress your fingers on the keyboard for you?

C’mon, let me give you $50. Pretty please?

The Ultimate Money Blog actually has a good breakdown of the service:

The basic gist of it is this: you want a new ipod, a Hawaiian vacation, a new bike, etc. First you start a profile on the site, then you establish your savings account and goal, and figure out your monthly contribution. Then you have the option to share with friends and family your savings goal so they can track your progress and make donations if they would like. Start saving, and before long you’ll meet your goal! 

Being Frugal also has a good review and like me, is having a SmartyPig contest with monetary rewards: 

What I Like About Smarty Pig

• You can’t beat the interest rate.
• Their customer service is top notch. They have responded quickly to customer requests to lower fees. They had an issue about a week ago, where their system rejected transfers that were supposed to happen over a weekend, and notified members that their accounts would be charged $25 fees. On the following Monday, I received a personal email from SmartyPig’s CEO apologizing, telling me my account would not be charged, and that they were fixing the problem immediately. They also quickly put up a blog post explaining what had happened, so their customers weren’t in the dark.
• Others can pitch in towards savings goals, which makes it an appealing choice to teach children to save.
• If I know I want to buy something from a particular retailer, I can get an additional savings bonus by receiving my money as a store gift card.
• Savings are automated, so I don’t miss the money.
• The website and avatars are pretty cute!

What I Don’t Like About Smarty Pig

• It’s another account to manage. I could achieve the same thing by opening an ING sub-account.
• I can’t just transfer money back to my funding source. (yet)

Every day they pump out bags and bags of your favorite post-kung-pao-chicken treat. Some are even flavored with chocolate. While others harbor naughty fortunes so you can enjoy them even more…in bed!

Can’t make it to San Francisco’s Chinatown? Then watch this quick clip and travel on your own 30 Second Vacation.

My question of “where does body fat go when it’s cinched into a corset” has been answered. Like cream, it rises to the top. Then is spills over and flops down over the white fabric and crystal beading to look like a second pair of breasts. Maybe not as fine as the ones in front (hell-yeah!). And maybe nipple-less, as men’s should be. But there they are just the same. Breasty.

Turns out the dress didn’t have as much fabric to let out as Lucy originally thought. It appears that the photo shoot people clipped the ample seams about every inch or so down the line, probably so they would lie flat for the model and not look puckered. That’s all well and good for her, but I’ve got 3 1/2 weeks until my flight takes off and I’m unaware of how to work out the fat above my shoulder blades.

Thankfully, before I can burst into tears, Lucy makes me feel like there are still a few options. I’m not wise enough in the ways of dress construction to really understand all that she’s proposing, but I put my faith in her that it’ll all turn out alright. She has a fantastic reputation and an optimistic demeanor. And really, what choice do I have?

Actually, I do have one choice. Romantic Weddings, the company I’ve contracted with in Bali to take care of all the wedding minutia that I have discovered I loathe, has their own bridal boutique. That means I can rent a dress at last minute if my impending lipo appointment fails to produce the desired results. Sure, it’ll cost me extra. Sure, I already have $345 invested in this dress and I think it’s beautiful and I’d hate not to be able to wear it. Sure, I’ll have carted a wedding dress with me 3,000 miles away only to have to cart it back unworn. But, knowing there’s a backup plan gives me the strength to hoist myself up onto Lucy’s dressing box in order for her to concentrate on less controversial topics, such as the hem.

So, will it fit? Will I have to pay for Photoshop classes for a budding Balinese photographer? Or will I have I have to keep my shoulders shrugged during the entire Balinese Blessing ceremony as though I’m unsure of my commitment to Travel Boyfriend? You’ll have to stay tuned to find out!

Linus and I met over a year ago during a clandestine job interview at Public Interest, a totally progressive and effective nonprofit advertising agency that I adore. In a mad rush, I had to fly down to LA to strut myself in the morning only to make it back to my full-time job in SF early enough that it seemed feasible I was only at a “doctor’s appointment.” Then 2 days later I turned around and flew off to Cape Town, South Africa (Not to brag, I mention this point only to demonstrate how delightfully hectic life was at the time.)

By looking at my resume, you’ll see that I didn’t end up with the job. But now, a year and a half later, I did get this T-shirt! And actually, that’s a more desirable outcome since a) I would have had to move to Santa Monica and b) this T-shirt is sweet.

lau zoo is launching their Spring 2008 collection in about 4 months time. But you can whet your appetite with this year’s designs by stopping by their site today.

Travel Betty Tip

Make a fashion statement while simultaneously making a political statement. Wear your lau zoo shirt to the next Beach Impeach event on October 7 at 11am in Berkeley. Then we can be twins!

Kulture Vulture Kids- 539 Dumaine St- Cute little clothes for badass babies. Like a “Boys Don’t Cry” Cure onesie. Or an “I’m already smarter than him” shirt with Bush’s face on it. If you just recently had a baby or know someone who has, and you want that baby to be the dopest in the day care, this is your store. And don’t worry if you’ve outgrown soiling your diapers. Turns out they’ve got a big kids shop too!

House of Lounge- 2044 Magazine St.- An elegant, low-key lingerie store. No Fredrick’s of Hollywood tackiness, or Victoria’s Secret faux couth. Just pretty little skimpies worthy of their place of honor covering your private parts. I bought something called Nippies! Fun.

Winky’s- 2038 Magazine St.- This is one of those cute, ironic hybrid shops where everything inside is full of sass. A mixture of clothing, toys, shoes, housewares and crap you don’t need, but is cool. I didn’t end up buying anything, but if I lived here, I’d definitely stop in and buy stuff in the future.

Voodoo Authentica- 612 Dumaine- Don’t feel shy walking inside. This cute shop stocks all your voodoo needs: dolls, gris-gris, potions, beauty products and assorted gifts. At the time I visited, they weren’t doing readings, but the delightful woman working there helped point me in the direction of master Voodoo Priest, John T.

Rodrigue Studio- 721 Royal St.- Yes, it’s Blue Dog. If you don’t like Blue Dog, you won’t like this gallery. I was indifferent to him until I went inside and saw all the cool post-Katrina Blue Dog paintings. Very cool.

Steadfast Brand- 14 S. Magnolia Ave., Ocala, FL 34474- Hey, wait a minute, this seems like a long way from New Orleans. Well, you’re right, it is. We met the owners of this rad-assed clothing store during 2 of our 3 nights at Lafitte’s. I took a look at their site and loved all the tat-culture inspired clothing for men and women. Their products are sold in dozens of stores nationwide (and the UK, crazy) Maybe even in a store near you. Check it.